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Four ways that NLP can improve everything from your career to relationships

Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a collection of techniques that help people do more of their good ‘programmes’ and change their unhelpful ones. The techniques get your conscious and unconscious mind working together for you, making it much easier to make changes than by will power alone ...

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Here are a few simple NLP approaches to try out:

Your Career

Use this approach to help you plan your career in around 15 minutes:

  1. Allow yourself to think freely ‘If you could do anything with your life or career, what you you like to do?’. Take some paper and write it down, it’s doesn’t have to be detailed just words or even draw a picture. The key here is just to dream freely, you will critique it later.
  2. Now look at the dream and make a plan, if you were to do this, what are the steps needed? Think about it as if you were planning for someone else, which will avoid you over thinking it at this stage.
  3. Now look at your plan and look at what’s missing. What’s needed that you haven’t thought of? What are the problems or objections to this?
  4. Apply your plan and critic to your dream in 1. Refine the dream as necessary.

As you look at the list notice what is it about them that impacts your energy?

Develop healthy routines

The purpose of this technique is to separate out the dream, the plan and the critic, because people often sabotage their dreams too early. Just as you have an idea another part of your brain says ‘can’t do that because …’. This way you consider each in turn rather than let each thought process contaminate the other. People find this helps them to generate both bigger and more achievable career goals.

We teach a more advanced version of this technique in our Mind Mastery for Business course.

Your Relationships

Miscommunication can be a relationship destroyer. This is where the ‘linguistics’ in NLP are so powerful. By consciously listening more actively and considering your verbal communication carefully, you can improve relationships. One way you can ‘match’ people better when relating is to tune into whether they have a preference for:

  • Visual - processes using picture descriptions and words like ‘look’ and ‘see’, what they see is important to them
  • Auditory - processes using words and sounds, what they hear is important to them
  • Feelings - processes based on emotions and touch, what they feel is important to them

Pick up their preference by listening and paying attention to what they focus on.

Then try communicating with them in a way that suits their preference. Top tips are:

  • Visuals - draw it out, uses pictures and diagrams, don’t just talk at them
  • Auditory - listen carefully and invest time in discussion, give them time to talk things through
  • Feelings - honour how they feel, don’t dismiss their feelings

Here’s a link to a free guide where you can find out more and take the test to see what your preference is.

Your Wellbeing

Take control of your emotions. Here are a few techniques to help you get started:

Body Scan

  1. Take a few deep breaths into your belly, breath in through your nose and out through your mouth
  2. As you breathe do an internal scan of your body, directing your breath to any areas of tension or stiffness

This exercise takes just a few minutes and will result in your ability to build emotional regulation, which is a key ingredient for your general wellbeing.

What do you say to yourself?

Pay attention to your internal dialogue, when you say negative things to yourself you are harming your wellbeing. If you have a habitual phrase you say think of a more constructive way to say it. Example: ‘I’m useless’ instead say ‘Not the best way to do it’ or ‘I could do that better’.

Your Health

Change your bad habits - we all know this but it is hard to change habits consciously. Here is a way of changing habits more easily:

  1. Think of a bad health habit you have and work out what starts it - the ‘trigger’. Do you have a thought, a feeling or promise yourself a ‘treat’?
  2. Find another way to meet the positive intention of the starting trigger. For example, if you are tired take a short break or find healthier ways to treat yourself

Even bad habits are trying to do something useful for us, if we can find better ways of meeting that need, change is easier without the focus being on stopping something.

You might also be interested in What is NLP? Learn more in this short video.

Karen was ranked #6 in 2018s Global Gurus - NLP Gurus top 30 ranking.

 

Photo by freepik.com
Last modified onThursday, 18 October 2018 14:02
 John McLachlan

Founder of Monkey Puzzle and an INLPTA NLP Master Trainer, John is also a Clinical Hypnotherapist and author of the award winning book Real Leaders for the Real World. His new book Time Mastery; Banish Time Management Forever is out now.

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